Holy Saturday's Gift...

"Truly, it is in the darkness that one finds light, so when we are in sorrow, then this light is nearest to all of us." - Meister Eckhart

"Help us to be the always-hopeful gardeners of the spirit who whow that without darkness nothing comes to birth, as without light, nothing flowers." - May Sarton

It's Holy Saturday and I'm trying to see how this part of the Easter story is relevant to me today. The expression that comes to mind is "sitting in the unknown". I used that expression this past week as I tried to understand my growing impatience & intolerance regarding my job situation. I became very aware of how I am trying to force a solution. I am not trusting that I need to keep doing the footwork, while letting go of the outcome.

Sitting in the unknown is awkward and uncomfortable. And I think therein lies the relevance of Holy Saturday for me this year. That day between the death & resurrection of Jesus represents all that is unknown. It is a time of confusion... I can just imagine the disciples saying: "What the...?! I thought he was going to save us, and now he's been executed in the manner reserved for the worst of criminals?!! What gives?!"

Of course, since we know how the story unfolds, we could say in hindsight that it represents a time of waiting. Hence the Vigil traditionally held on Saturday evening. But personally, I don't think they were waiting 2000 years ago. They must have thought it was all over. All they could do was grieve their loss - and in secret no less (except for the women), lest they be accused of being one of the Nazarene's followers. They must have been mired in self-doubt, wondering if they had been led astray. This scenario seems more realistic to me.

So, perhaps today is a time to practice being OK with sitting in the unknown... in the self-doubt... in the mystery. Today can be a lesson in acceptance. Acceptance of what is, as it is. Easier said than done...

PAX,